Wait, Are We Really Doing This?

Wait, Are We Really Doing This?

The Diary of an RV Newbie, Part 4

woman moving boxes
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels

July 7, 2020

So much has happened since my last diary entry in May. All of June, I was consumed researching everything I could about the RV life. I scoured Youtube, read several books and blogs, and subscribe to forums where there are numerous people in the middle of this lifestyle change. I had no idea so many people have already opted to live nomadic ways in glampers, tiny houses, schoolies, and vans. Out of curiosity, I went to a nearby RV dealership to get educated on the different types. I sat in travel trailers, fifth wheels, and even perused a Class A. Taking a moment to sit on one of the RV recliners, all I did was look around and ask myself, “Can I imagine myself living in one of these?”

I could hear that little voice on the inside of me say “Yes” and I felt even more assured that I was on the right path. Then it hit me, “What are we going to do with all of our stuff?”

My husband has a bit of a hoarding problem and I understand considering his childhood. There was a time he was homeless as a little boy so having things around is a significant value to him and we’d have to come up with a compromise. He is going to have a difficult time letting things go or put our stuff in storage. I have connections to a lot of material things in the house too. What if I can’t let go of them? I do not know if I am brave enough to do such a thing. Am I seriously considering this? This is not how I imagined myself living as a thirty-seven-year-old woman.

When I returned home, I could feel my unhappiness slowly sink in. I hung my purse up and took a tour around the house. Walking into the office, I rolled my eyes at the rental contract where it was neatly stacked on the desk. Then my gaze fell to the numerous items that I accumulated in hopes that it would fill my life with enjoyment. In the corner, sat my wine globe with my decanter. My bookshelf was packed full of all of the books I have read multiple times, and organized according to size and color that looked like it could be published in an article of Better Homes & Gardens. To my right was the lamp that I painstakingly scoured the internet for to ensure it coordinated with my farmhouse decor. Suddenly, those things did not mean anything to me.

I toured the rest of the house and felt the same way about everything else. I felt like everything was just “things” and suddenly lost value. They started to feel more like an anchor that was slowly pulling me down. Remembering how at peace I was in the RVs, I knew at that moment that if I could have freedom or stuff: The choice will be freedom.

When Jim came home from work, I told him “We are going to do this. Let’s live the RV lifestyle.”

His eyes widened and asked, “Are you serious?” I nodded and he replied, “I never thought you’d go for the idea, but think it’s cool that you are willing to give it a try.”

I explained to him how it feels like the right thing for us to do. Over the years, I have learned to listen to my gut, and — so far — it has not steered me wrong. Despite his agreement with me, he simply said “okay then” and retreated to the shower. Watching him walk away, I got the sense that he doesn’t believe me. I know he thinks that I’ll change my mind or will flake out.

While he was getting cleaned up, I got the ladder out of the garage and started pulling my decor down from the walls. I started to do my homely triage of items to start coming to terms with what I was willing to sell or donate. By the time he returned to the living room, I already had a sizable corner of things piled in the corner. He examined it and after seeing that I did not choose any of his stuff, he quietly walked away. I can tell he is slowly approving because he always hated the number of decor items I had in the house.

However, it was not until a week later when Jim returned from work to see that I sold all of our paintings, nightstands, and our headboard. The walls stood bare like a blank canvas. He stood frozen in the doorway, “Wait, wait, wait…” he rose his hands up. “Are we doing this? I need some more time to think about it and get used to the idea.”

Taking a breath and remembering what he told me about his childhood, I paused posting my next Facebook Marketplace item. “Do you not want to do this? If you don’t tell me now and I’ll stop. I’ll figure something else out.” I remember my stomach getting queazy that we may be back to the beginning and I’m going to have to figure out another plan forward.

To my relief, he continued, “No. I want to do it, but I seriously never thought you’d go for this idea.”

We agreed that I should continue to reduce our footprint in the house. However, I agreed that I would run by him anything I come across that strictly belonged to him. After all, I want him to be on board with this idea. If I just start selling his stuff without his permission, he is going to start resisting the idea. I’ll figure that part out later. In the meantime, I’ll continue at this pace and start narrowing down what RV we are going to get!

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Crystal A. Walker

I'm a Top Writer in Humor and Travel on Medium! I'm also a self-published author and full-time RVer who loves to travel the world when I can. Writing is a passion of mine and I've dabbled in a variety of genres to include romantic comedy and fantasy, in addition to blogging.


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Crystal A. Walker